An “Honorific” Edition of Quotes out of Context

I’d like to begin this edition by saying that I greatly respect and admire Dan Allender. I am immeasurably blessed by and thankful for all he give me as a professor and school president. And, I am amazed at his intellect and wielding of words – ie, who would have guessed that “honorific” is actually a word – surprised me!

This man is amazing and “honorific,” but he does say some funny things!

Anyway, here you go:

“Do you love the way thorns and thistles feel as you weed your garden? If the answer is yes then we are in the realm of sexual disorders.”

“Sit here and watch Jerry Springer with me.”

“The task of a woman is to be a nuisance to her children.”

“I think they are involved in connubial bliss.”

“Am I for the hippopotamus?…This is not suitable for me.”

“My wife makes me cry a lot.”

“I like avoiding the conflict I tend to create.”

“Balance: obviously I’ve never achieved it and, therefore, do not like the word.”

“[All the Rambo movies were] bad, really wickedly stupid.”

“I am not claiming to be a completely mature human being.”

“Frankly my wife scares me to death.”